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From The Blog
Random Thoughts: Spring Cleaning (Mar 08)
March 17, 2008 at 03:39 AM
I’m not sure how it happened, but this monthly blog o’ mine has somehow become a bi-weekly blog. The spring cleaning going on in my life apparently has nothing to do with mopping floors, kicking out dust balls or even scrubbing a few dishes down- I’m cleaning out the excess crap in my head. Crap that you all read… :)So in my last edition, ...
I’m not sure how it happened, but this monthly blog o’ mine has somehow become a bi-weekly blog. The spring cleaning going on in my life apparently has nothing to do with mopping floors, kicking out dust balls or even scrubbing a few dishes down- I’m cleaning out the excess crap in my head. Crap that you all read… :)
So in my last edition, I spoke quite adamantly about the Vatican’s decision to declare seven new sins for all of our enjoyment purposes. I broke down all the variables about said ‘sins’ and after I helped to make something which is illogical logical I made the mistake of telling the Vatican to ‘go screw’. For this, I apologize…
The Vatican doesn’t need any one else giving them permission to screw anybody. HII OHHHH!
‘I’ve never been a fan of flags of any type. Flags bring people together, but they always bring people together AGAINST other people. I’m a child of this whole planet, not of one nation.’
-Michael Franti
------------------------------------------------------------------
Why is it if you’re a ‘nobody’ people have a harder time listening to what you have to say, but if you’re on television your word matters more than most?
Remember in Kindergarten if a girl liked you should would pick on you and throw crayons in your general direction? I really wish these methods stayed with us into adulthood because I’m not good at ‘reading the signs’ or playing head games.
I think that these gigantic hippie music festivals need a little humor in them in terms of performance. No, I’m not talking about a Gallagher reunion tour; I’m talking about halfway through the festival, you break out an old school boy band that no one has seen in some time. Seriously, how much fun would that be to see on the news? You have thousands of people stoned out of there minds for days, and then you bring back New Kids On The Block; there would be hundreds of brain aneurysms due to the mental confusion on whether or not what these people are seeing is real or a hallucination. ‘Dude, is that Joey Macintyre up there? Why didn’t anyone tell me about the brown acid?’
If you don’t have paint all over at least one piece of clothing than you’re not an artist.
A leader should never be someone who has never known the feeling of want.
It’s so odd, but I’ve noticed that the more talent you have the more people will listen to you.
If you are still wearing one of those old ass sports Starter jackets from the early nineties, than you my friend need to get a job.
Sometimes, not a lot, but sometimes; I wonder if I’ll ever grow old and miserable with someone. Then I remember, I’m already doing that with myself. (lol)
Why is it that I thank the toll booth guy/lady every morning on my way to work? There is no reason why I should have to give up my hard earned cash to pay for the right to keep going down the same road I’ve already been driving on miles. We should not have to pay to drive over roads in this country, especially roads that are in the state you live in. If you have to enter another state then I can understand (slightly) a reason to pay up. ‘What? You wanna’ see the Red Sox? Fork over the buck, fella.’ Even that’s pushing it considering you already paid a ridiculous amount of money for tickets to see a boring sport.
If you have someone in your life who tells you that its WRONG or EVIL to question something, than you must do your best to rid yourself of that person from your life, if of course you can’t change their perspective on things. Question everything my friends, it’s one of our last ‘American rights’ that we have left; for a little while at least…
‘And on the 7th Day the Lord rested, and the Devil took advantage and created ‘The Mall’.
Whose voice makes you want to stick pencils in your ear more- Jerry Seinfeld or Fran Drescher?
Using a debit card does not take less time at the checkout counter than cash.
Since I’m a guy (and a straight one at that), it’s absurdly difficult to understand the women’s need to buy so many clothes and shoes. I am like most guys, and I do appreciate a woman who looks nice, but nice to me can be something as lackadaisical as a pair of tight jeans and a kick ass Jimi Hendrix shirt (you taking notes?).Why waste so much money buying fancy clothes for us? The only guys who are going to notice fancy clothes are gay anyway. Remember ladies: a straight male’s goal in life is to get you OUT of those clothes and it won’t matter how much money you spent on them or what brand they are. (lol you want honesty, there it is in all it’s profound glory)
You know you spelt a word wrong when the ‘Spelling and Grammar’ tool on Word can’t find any suggestions for you.
The term ‘sell out’ is bullshit to me, and it only applies to those people who give up completely on their talents and aspirations to do something with their life for the sole purpose of financial gain. The reason I bring this up is because back in art school, I would hear teachers and fellow students talk about what it meant to have ‘true artistic expression’ and how if you drew something corporate or commercial than you were a ‘sell out’. For example: if you were to look at my ‘Bubble Madness’ piece; (something I worked on that came from a feeling of deep sadness and boredom) you would see a piece of art that is ‘expressive’. If you were to look at my ‘Lego Star Wars’ piece, than you would see work that was done strictly for the want of peoples money. I like the video game, I’ve played it every once and then, but I knew going into it that I was drawing the piece because millions of kids and adults play it and I could make some serious cash by selling prints of the thing. Does this make me a sell out? No; it makes me a survivalist. Listen you aspiring artists; and take it from me because I’ve sold quite a lot of work in the last few years: the moment you get a chance to grab some money from someone by selling them your art, you fucking take it! Period. Don’t you dare let anyone call you a sell out if you’ve sold a piece of art work and they couldn’t sell water to a guy in the desert.
Group think is the worst kind of thought process because it has nothing to do with thought.
I’ve had my fill with clichés. Especially the LIVE, LOVE, LAUGH one that a lot of you ladies seem to paste all over your pages. Who are these people talking about? I don’t see to many people truly living; I see lots of people getting by or existing. Love? I see more hate than love, especially this new generation of young adults who think that if they don’t get their own personal plane with their name written on it in huge, glittery letters for their 16th birthday, that their parents are shit. Laugh; yeah, I see and hear laughter. It’s coming mostly from myself as I continue to observe the masses and how they take themselves so damn seriously.
Another cliché that itches my ass: ‘Live every day as if it were your last’. How is that possible? Don’t you people have work and the need to sleep some time during the week? If you live every day as if it were your last, than why are you on a diet? Why are you laying on the couch watching football all day on Sunday? Listen- the only people who have the ability to live every day like its there last are people who are overwhelming financially secure. Take Britney Spears for example; there’s a girl who lived every day as if it were her last, and look where she is now.
I have a personal cliché for all of you to ponder over: ‘Live every day as if it were your first.’
I feel incredibly sorry for the Nascar driver who has to endorse Viagra on the hood of his car.
Announcer: ‘GENTLEMEN…. START YOUR ENGINES!’ ‘
Driver: ‘Uhh, excuse me; could you give me a couple minutes? My car takes a little longer to warm up…’
I want a bumper sticker that says, ‘My kid sold dope to your honor student’, SO BADLY. Who can I contact to get this done for me?
There’s a lot of responsibility that comes with knowing the right thing to say almost all of the time.
Parents take notice; if your kid ‘Heelllloooo?’s me, I will slap the shit out of you.
_______________________________________________
Enjoy your Guiness, people.
The Jester
So in my last edition, I spoke quite adamantly about the Vatican’s decision to declare seven new sins for all of our enjoyment purposes. I broke down all the variables about said ‘sins’ and after I helped to make something which is illogical logical I made the mistake of telling the Vatican to ‘go screw’. For this, I apologize…
The Vatican doesn’t need any one else giving them permission to screw anybody. HII OHHHH!
‘I’ve never been a fan of flags of any type. Flags bring people together, but they always bring people together AGAINST other people. I’m a child of this whole planet, not of one nation.’
-Michael Franti
------------------------------------------------------------------
Why is it if you’re a ‘nobody’ people have a harder time listening to what you have to say, but if you’re on television your word matters more than most?
Remember in Kindergarten if a girl liked you should would pick on you and throw crayons in your general direction? I really wish these methods stayed with us into adulthood because I’m not good at ‘reading the signs’ or playing head games.
I think that these gigantic hippie music festivals need a little humor in them in terms of performance. No, I’m not talking about a Gallagher reunion tour; I’m talking about halfway through the festival, you break out an old school boy band that no one has seen in some time. Seriously, how much fun would that be to see on the news? You have thousands of people stoned out of there minds for days, and then you bring back New Kids On The Block; there would be hundreds of brain aneurysms due to the mental confusion on whether or not what these people are seeing is real or a hallucination. ‘Dude, is that Joey Macintyre up there? Why didn’t anyone tell me about the brown acid?’
If you don’t have paint all over at least one piece of clothing than you’re not an artist.
A leader should never be someone who has never known the feeling of want.
It’s so odd, but I’ve noticed that the more talent you have the more people will listen to you.
If you are still wearing one of those old ass sports Starter jackets from the early nineties, than you my friend need to get a job.
Sometimes, not a lot, but sometimes; I wonder if I’ll ever grow old and miserable with someone. Then I remember, I’m already doing that with myself. (lol)
Why is it that I thank the toll booth guy/lady every morning on my way to work? There is no reason why I should have to give up my hard earned cash to pay for the right to keep going down the same road I’ve already been driving on miles. We should not have to pay to drive over roads in this country, especially roads that are in the state you live in. If you have to enter another state then I can understand (slightly) a reason to pay up. ‘What? You wanna’ see the Red Sox? Fork over the buck, fella.’ Even that’s pushing it considering you already paid a ridiculous amount of money for tickets to see a boring sport.
If you have someone in your life who tells you that its WRONG or EVIL to question something, than you must do your best to rid yourself of that person from your life, if of course you can’t change their perspective on things. Question everything my friends, it’s one of our last ‘American rights’ that we have left; for a little while at least…
‘And on the 7th Day the Lord rested, and the Devil took advantage and created ‘The Mall’.
Whose voice makes you want to stick pencils in your ear more- Jerry Seinfeld or Fran Drescher?
Using a debit card does not take less time at the checkout counter than cash.
Since I’m a guy (and a straight one at that), it’s absurdly difficult to understand the women’s need to buy so many clothes and shoes. I am like most guys, and I do appreciate a woman who looks nice, but nice to me can be something as lackadaisical as a pair of tight jeans and a kick ass Jimi Hendrix shirt (you taking notes?).Why waste so much money buying fancy clothes for us? The only guys who are going to notice fancy clothes are gay anyway. Remember ladies: a straight male’s goal in life is to get you OUT of those clothes and it won’t matter how much money you spent on them or what brand they are. (lol you want honesty, there it is in all it’s profound glory)
You know you spelt a word wrong when the ‘Spelling and Grammar’ tool on Word can’t find any suggestions for you.
The term ‘sell out’ is bullshit to me, and it only applies to those people who give up completely on their talents and aspirations to do something with their life for the sole purpose of financial gain. The reason I bring this up is because back in art school, I would hear teachers and fellow students talk about what it meant to have ‘true artistic expression’ and how if you drew something corporate or commercial than you were a ‘sell out’. For example: if you were to look at my ‘Bubble Madness’ piece; (something I worked on that came from a feeling of deep sadness and boredom) you would see a piece of art that is ‘expressive’. If you were to look at my ‘Lego Star Wars’ piece, than you would see work that was done strictly for the want of peoples money. I like the video game, I’ve played it every once and then, but I knew going into it that I was drawing the piece because millions of kids and adults play it and I could make some serious cash by selling prints of the thing. Does this make me a sell out? No; it makes me a survivalist. Listen you aspiring artists; and take it from me because I’ve sold quite a lot of work in the last few years: the moment you get a chance to grab some money from someone by selling them your art, you fucking take it! Period. Don’t you dare let anyone call you a sell out if you’ve sold a piece of art work and they couldn’t sell water to a guy in the desert.
Group think is the worst kind of thought process because it has nothing to do with thought.
I’ve had my fill with clichés. Especially the LIVE, LOVE, LAUGH one that a lot of you ladies seem to paste all over your pages. Who are these people talking about? I don’t see to many people truly living; I see lots of people getting by or existing. Love? I see more hate than love, especially this new generation of young adults who think that if they don’t get their own personal plane with their name written on it in huge, glittery letters for their 16th birthday, that their parents are shit. Laugh; yeah, I see and hear laughter. It’s coming mostly from myself as I continue to observe the masses and how they take themselves so damn seriously.
Another cliché that itches my ass: ‘Live every day as if it were your last’. How is that possible? Don’t you people have work and the need to sleep some time during the week? If you live every day as if it were your last, than why are you on a diet? Why are you laying on the couch watching football all day on Sunday? Listen- the only people who have the ability to live every day like its there last are people who are overwhelming financially secure. Take Britney Spears for example; there’s a girl who lived every day as if it were her last, and look where she is now.
I have a personal cliché for all of you to ponder over: ‘Live every day as if it were your first.’
I feel incredibly sorry for the Nascar driver who has to endorse Viagra on the hood of his car.
Announcer: ‘GENTLEMEN…. START YOUR ENGINES!’ ‘
Driver: ‘Uhh, excuse me; could you give me a couple minutes? My car takes a little longer to warm up…’
I want a bumper sticker that says, ‘My kid sold dope to your honor student’, SO BADLY. Who can I contact to get this done for me?
There’s a lot of responsibility that comes with knowing the right thing to say almost all of the time.
Parents take notice; if your kid ‘Heelllloooo?’s me, I will slap the shit out of you.
_______________________________________________
Enjoy your Guiness, people.
The Jester
